Hell yeah I'll go home.

It's that time of the month again. No I'm not on the rag. It's the end of the month. It's hour cutting time. Time to make all the columns balance out. So, I got to go home 3.5 hours early.

Woo hoo. I know they will want to cut hours tomarrow. I hope they ask me.

Ok. People once again you do not, I repeat, do not tuck a tank top into cotton shorts. Ever for any reason. You really don't do it when you are wearing a dayglow green tank top and black shorts. If you feel you must tuck to keep your enormous gut covered. For Gods sake as well as mine. Do not pull your shorts up under your saggy man boobs. This is just repulsive.

Think and then invest in a full length mirror. It would save you a lot of embarassment. Just think for a second "If I saw me wearing this, would I laugh." If you don't know. Don't wear it.

ttfn

The joys of having children.

Ok so little C. has been having a crisis.

First off he thinks he's going to turn into a Skittle. How you might ask could he believe this? Just how every young boy in the world believe's everything. Their friends tell them. The little neighbor boy told him he was going to turn into a Skittle. So, he comes to me last night crying and says while pointing at his body. "What's wrong with this?" Of course I have no idea what he's talking about. Then I finally got it out of him. He was using his finger to trace where the outline of where is "S" for Skittles would be.

Then today he tells me he's going to turn into a lizard.

Then the other issue of last night. Someone told him the world was going to end and he was going to die and come back as a baby and be all alone. I told him that wasn't going to happen, but what kind of sedistic bastard would tell that to a seven year old.

Well. That's all for tonight.

ttfn

Tonight on Fox News at 10

"Stick up in porn shop"
This could have so many meanings.

And there is a recall on a tread mill. The reason rapid acceleration. I personally think that it is the machines way of saying. "Get your fat ass moving."

Ex beavers are Padres.

Daylight savings time is being expanded. The government thinks this will conserve enegy.

While Portland recycling collectors are dumping it all in the landfill.

Enough said.

ttfn

From the gross files.

Shrimp boating:

After completing the act of anal sex the ejaculating partner must take a straw and remove the semen from the anus while drinking it.

This helpful definition brought to you from those online playing guys on the zone. Thanks for the helpful info.

Oh my god.

Straight men look away. I'm gonna' gush for a moment.

Oh my god I just saw the tastiest thing to walk on two legs.

I was looking out my bedroom window, and what should I see. The hottest man I've seen. (Excluding my darling Zevon of course.) He had the firmest body I've seen on a man in a long time. Face it there's not a lot of eye candy around this little shit hole town. Not muscle bound just firm. He looked up at my window and he had the bluest eyes I've seen. He had a tan all over. He was wearing jean shorts low on his hips and a tank top. The kind of outfit that leads you to believe that he's that tan everywhere. Not terrible tall. The best thing on this man was his ass. He had an ass you could sink your teeth into.

OK enough gushing for now. Back to cleaning.

ttfn

Cleaning

Today is cleaning day(shudder). Oh well I guess it's time to vacuum up a weeks worth of accumulated crap. Do my dishes again and laundry. I've got at least another four days before I have another day off. So, I guess I best make the most of it. I'm defrosting the freezer as I type this. I swear if I could afford it I would move once a week and leave the mess. Or I would hire a maid.

The kids are going to clean their room today and the big one is going to help with laundry if I have to smack him with a broom or have his brother kiss him in front of his friends. This place will at least be presentable for the next two days.

Trash will be taken out under threat of death. I think it's almost time for the big one to learn to do dishes. Then I will be able to do more important things like cleaning the bathroom. Well the place isn't cleaning itself.

ttfn

Update (just like unsolved mysteries)

The slip and fall girl was running and jumping through the store when the slip occured. There was an actual witness. Another customer actually saw the fall and talked to the girl before I or the mother arrived on the scene. I still have to turn in my statement but I'm waiting for the guy I talked to about it to come in. Oh my god, he is so hot.

ttfn

Slip and fall revisited.

I have a lot of thinking to do today. I think I've gone and stepped in it. The little girl who slipped and fell in a puddle of water at UGH and had a bitch for a mother. Here is a recap.

The little girl is walking quickly, she slips, and she falls. OK. I saw her walking holding her back and heard her friend say she fell at which point moved the wet floor sign to the middle of the puddle, and asked the girl if she was ok. Not the mom the kid. All this time the mom is yelling about how I was just trying to avoid a lawsuit. Which until then had not even entered my mind. I was just worried someone else was going to fall. The mother was still yelling and bitching when I decided to grab the quart of milk I was originally going for. The milk was not even 6 ft. away. After I grabbed the milk, I walked over to the woman and her child and asked her if she'd like to talk to the manager and fill out an accident report. She yelled at me that there was no point in it now.

I would have been more than happy to go to the manager with her and tell what happened. Instead I walked up front to the managers office. On the way I came in contact with the woman again and asked her if she was sure she didn't want to speak to the manager. I was just going to get him, and she screamed at me, "I don't want to talk to you, you're rude." Then I proceeded to the manager's office and no one was there. At which time I heard the checker call for a manager and the woman yelling. I thought that was the end of it. Well, I guess the woman took her child to the doctor. Then I thought that was the end of it again. Oh no that would be too easy. Today a woman came in and said her daughter was the little girl that was with the girl who fell and that the people at this store were rude, and it was not handled well.

Now I was afraid the mother would come into the store and get me fired so I went to our stores union steward and asked her what to do. She told me to go to managment so I went to the second assistant front end manager and told him. Now I have to document the incident for them. I just have a feeling that it's going to go bad for me. I'm scared and crying now. I'm afraid of losing my job and I'm afraid what this visious woman would do if she knew I was documenting it.

ttfn

Fun with shit.

In the last few weeks I have seen and heard about more shit at work than I have had flushed down my own toilet by the 4 people that use it.

First off, there was someone who decided human excrement was as good as finger paint in the mens room. They took a huge shit on the floor and then proceeded to paint the toilet, the walls, the ceiling, and a lovely face on the mirror. Of course they used the most lovely color of brown(shit brown) for this lovely art work.

The janitor upon seeing this lovely art project proceeded to hook up a water hose with a pressure nozzle turned up on full volume. He then put an out of service sign on the mens room door, pulled the door closed on the hose, and turned the water on. After 20 or so minutes he turned off the water and took a gallon of bleach in and splashed it around the bathroom. Which had already had most of the offending substance hosed off. Then he closed the door and turned the hose back on for 20 more minutes. That took care of that shitty situation.

The latest incident happened today. A unknown person dropped their pants in the bathroom. Not so uncommon being it's a restroom. Then they squatted, once again it is a mens public restroom. Then they proceeded to shit on the floor. Not only did they shit on the floor and not pick it up and dispose of it. They stepped in it. Then the person proceeded to do all their shopping. Only on the persons way out did another customer notice that they where leaving a trail. The witness told the manager Big Cheif I Havum No Balls that there was shit all over the store. Once again they called in the poor janitor. He had to go into the restroom and clean up the initial pile and then trace the shit heads trail and clean up after him.

This is the forth such shitty incident that I have heard about in the last year and a half I have worked for UGH. Of course there was the great potato pissing incident that was the inspiration for the first post on this blog.

Well, the kids want to play on the computer so.

ttfn

That thing only holds 400 pounds dumbass.

Ok. Today it rained so the really fat people came out.

First off you must know what a mart cart is. A mart cart is the electric cart that has the basket on it so old people and people who have trouble walking can use them to get their grocery shopping done.

They are not, I repeat, are not for people over 400 pounds. It says right on the control panel on the front. Right by where you turn it on at. NOT MEANT TO HOLD PERSONS IN EXCESS OF 400 LBS. BASKET IS NOT MEANT TO HOLD MORE THAN 100 LBS. This is in bold print all caps like I typed it.

So, yesterday we got 2 new mart carts that say the same thing.

Today a woman well over the 400 lb. weight limit tried to use one of the old almost worn out mart carts. How do I know she was well over the weight requirement? You might ask that. The reason is that first she had to wedge herself into the thing with her belly resting on the top of the controle panel. Also the second and most important reason. The son of a bitch wouldn't move. Not an inch, hell not even a centimeter. The whale in question cursed out our new mentally deficiant courtesy clerk. (Not a joke he really is a special needs idividual) Then he had to be saved by another courtesy clerk (not me I was on break) who brought the enormous bitch one of the new mart carts. What did the whale say to all this you might ask? She asked, "What is wrong with that thing I've always used them in the past and they worked just fine?"

No shit they worked just fine before her fat ass and the fat asses of others started using them on a daily basis. If you really need the cart to get your fat ass around then buy one of your own.

Who the hell do you think you are?

The large boy. Oh him of the nasty feet. The 10 year old wonder. The little bitch decided yesterday that he was in charge enough to yell at me. Yes, me the great and powerful Doublebagger.

The little bitch told me that he could do what ever he wanted and say what ever the hell he wanted. I told him I was still his mother and he had to listen to me. He then thought in all of his 10 year old wisdom that I was going to take that shit from his little punk ass. He thought just because my knee hurt I wouldn't chase him.

Well he thought wrong. I got up and cornered his little ass in the hall, drug his ass back to the living room couch, and proceeded to give him a good old fashioned spanking. Then he had the nerve to tell me he was too old to get a spankin'. To which I told him that as long as I can catch or corner his ass he was not too big for a spankin' and never would be.

Now he seems to have learned his place. We shall see over the next few days.

ttfn

I'm reading again

Today at work I read Lord of the Flies, and at home I'm reading Anne Rice's Taltos. Next I have no idea what I'll read.

I'm awaiting a book I bought on ebay. I can't remember what the name of it is or even who the author is.

My memory sucks ass lately. That's what happens when I have to work for 30 or more hours a week. Today was pretty boring not much going on.

I tried to do as little as possible at work. Which means I hung out in the back room as much as I could get away with.

In the past few months I've read the entire Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy series. Not to mention at least 100 more books. I read at least 6-10 a week.

I need to go make diner maybe I'll get some ideas for a post later.

More wrong outfits.

Today it was hot but not too bad. So, thus all the scary fat people come out.

Here is just a list of what I saw today:

A enormous man in running shorts. The short little ones. He was also wearing a tank top, black socks, and camoflage flip flops.

The (I'm sorry to say) ugliest teenaged girl I've ever seen. (Her parents who she was shopping with should be shot for letting her wear this shirt in public.) Her shirt said "If I throw a stick will you go away. Some of my male co-workers commented on this poor unfortunate creatures shirt for the next 20 minutes.

A large woman at least 375 lbs. in a mini sundress. Enough said.

Too many fat, and when I say fat I mean 350+ usually way +, women in belly shirts. If more of fat is hanging out of the bottom of your shirt than you have in the top of your shirt it does not look sexy.

Hey large ladies I'm all for the low cut tshirts with a well fitting bra to make the most of what god gave ya. Though you must realize even if your man likes what you look like in a belly shirt with your rolls hanging out. Not everyone does. Have a little pride.

Treat yourself with a little respect. You can get a man if you want one, but you don't need to dress like the pilsbury dough boy wrapped up tight in plastic wrap.

A man would be just as happy to talk to a large womans breasts if they're put out there as they would a small womans.

Case in point. I am not in the +++++ range but I am a well indowed woman. God had also seen fit to give me an fairly large chest. (DDD is a rather tight cup size) I have an outfit I wear when I go out with my boyfriend. It's a black pair of slightly baggy slacks, a black low cut shirt, and a bra that brings the twins up for some sunlight. Well, I went into my work to check my schedule before we went to the movies. At least 4 of my male co-workers including one supervisor didn't know who I was until I said something. Being as they were staring and talking to my breasts. So, see if you've got it flaunt it, but if you don't keep that shit covered because no one wants to see that shit out in public.

Ok. Now for the men. No socks with flip flops. If you are large you should wear longer shorts. Do not, I repeat DO NOT wear black socks or any other socks pulled all the way up to your knees with shorts. This is not just wrong it's tacky. Pants should always cover the crack of your ass. You can not wear a belly shirt unless you are gay. If you are gay and fat you should not wear a belly shirt either. And for god sake trim your armpit hairs. I have no desire to have an eye put out by that 6 foot deoderant stiffened armpit hair.

This is for men and women. For gods sake and ours wash your nasty asses. Deoderant is a must. Buy it, use it, love it. That's all the ranting I need to do for now.

I CAN'T BELIEVE A WOMAN CAME UP WITH THAT

The new tag line advertising campaign for Always maxi pads:

Have a happy period. Always.

Was made up by you'll never guess. A woman what a traitor to her gender. She says pad users are more in touch with their period and that they look at it as natural where as tampon users just want it to go away. I use pads for like 10 days out of the month so don't tell me I don't just want it to go away.

All the women out there that feel the same should email the company and tell them what you think. If you don't believe me you should google Have a happy period and see the yahoo article on the new ad campaign. OK now I really must be off to bed. Goodnight all.

ttfn

My Shitty Assed Day

To start this I get to smell the aroma of shit as my oldest just walked out of the bathroom and left the door open. Not to mention that I just moved his shoes from under the computer desk.

Let us see. My day started out ok. Then I went to work. At work I encountered a woman who under normal circumstances I would not speak to. Her child slipped and fell in a puddle of water at UGH. Then when I repositioned the wet floor sign that was already there so that no one else would fall in that spot. She started screaming at me about how I was trying to avoid a lawsuit by moving the sign so there would be no proof it wasn't in the middle of the puddle her child fell in. Like I give a shit that something that should have been fixed a long time ago could cause a lawsuit. Would serve UGH right.

The other problem of the day. The water all over UGH. The produce department was completely flooded at several points during the day. When the meat department came in this morning their department was flooded from the meat cooler to the working area. Produce was so bad that water was pouring outside the store through the concrete side wall of the building into the loading dock area. The bakery cooler for cream pies is leaking puddles of water so is the beer cooler and one of the juice endcap coolers. I can't believe that of the places that are leaking most have only just been installed with the remodel in the last 2 and a half months.

To top this all off my knee has been so killing me from about 4 hours into my shift on. That's what happens when they give you 4 days off in a row and expect you to come back and work an eight hour shift on a bad knee. Not even to mention that I had an ingrown toenail on the foot oposite the sore knee. Notice I said had. I took care of that bitch myself with toenail clippers, a sharp nail file, and a pair of tweezers. I felt like being a tough macho bitch tonight. Though I think next time I will go to the doctor. If for nothing else just so I can get something for the pain before the digging starts.

Ok. Just one more thing before bed. I'm speaking to all of the large ladies out there. You know who you are. Stretch pants are all well and good, so are slacks. Neither of these things should be worn way too tight in the color of light pink with out a untucked shirt that covers up your fat ass. I saw a woman today. I shit you not. She was wearing a kind of stretch pant slacks in pale pink. The pants were atleast a size or two too small, and she had the white dress shirt tucked in. She was just grocery shopping but still I don't want to see you bend over in that and neither does anyone else. We really don't need to know that you like bright red high thigh cut granny panties now do we. Nor do we wish to see the celulite on your ass and thighs through your ugly assed ill fittting pants.

Ok, now I'm off to bed. I hope tomarrow goes better than today.

ttfn

I read way too much.

Ok , so the Half-Blood Prince is no more. I read that in 31 hours. I took 9 hours of that for sleep. This was only possible because my days off fell at the end of one pay period and the beginning of another. That was 4 days off in a row.

I also read Sweet Dreams by William W. Johnstone and On the street where you live by Mary Higgins Clark. Plus I cleaned my entire apartment and did all my laundry.

Now I wait for the next Harry Potter book. I also wait for the next Kim Harrison book in October, and the second book in the Dean Koontz Frankenstein series due out next month.

There were a lot of questions raised in the half-blood prince that I will not go into here. Only to say I hope it wraps up well in what is supposed to be the final book, book 7.

Now I will reread Lord of the Flies. Then I don't know the employees at UGH have started a sort of lending library in the breakroom. I guess I will check out what they have too.

Not much going on this weekend so good night all.

ttfn

Bitch Slapping

I think bitch slapping in a vastly under used tool. People should be sentenced in court to a good bitch slapping.

If you sell a bad product.
If you cheat on your spouse you get bitch slapped by the wife/husband and by every one in the wronged spouses family.
Breaking up with someone through an e-mail.
Being a dumb ass.
Implying your segificant other is fat or stupid.
Stupid advertising slogans.
Being a used car salesman.(Just on general principle. Once a day.)
Being an executive, advertiser, or developer at Johnson and Johnson for the whole KY Jelly thing.
If you abandon seginficant other (by leaving state or other) without notice.
If you don't pay child support when you are supposed to.
If you'd rather touch yourself than your partner.

These bitch slappings should be a public event. With the receiver of the bitch slapping wearing a big sign telling what their crime was. That only seems fair and just. So, the general public can make fun of them as they leave their bitch slapping appointment.

ttfn

The Pope Hates Harry Potter

Guess what? The pope hates Harry Potter and he's not the only one.

People have protested the books and movies since they first came out. Their reasons are varied and stupid. They judge the books without having read them.

One of their reasons is that it's a book about a teenage wizard. OOoooooooo, magic. Who cares? The other reasons include that people die and it gives and askewed view of good and evil.

I think that the books have a simple meaning. That good cannot win without sacrifice. Like when Harry's mother gave up her life for her child therefor saving him. A few people give up their lives so the ones that they care about can live, and people that they don't even know and that will never hear of their sacrifice can have a better life. What nobler meaning can there be?

So, what if there's death in the books? Death happens even in real life. Oh, well enough ranting for now.

ttfn

My favorite things from That 70's Show.

1. When Fez does his I said good day thing.
2. Red
3. The way Eric always makes things worse even though you think it's not posible.
4. Fez's perverted ways.
5. Hyde
6. The circle when they all get stoned.
7. Face it I love that stupid ass show.

Maybe I shouldn't post and drink at the same time.

ttfn

WTF?

Ok we've all seen the tampon commercials where the woman is wearing a little white skirt running along the beach. What kind of a dumb ass wears white on the lower half of their body during their period if they don't have to?

There are also the Midol commercials. You know the ones where the teen girl is wearing a bikini and talking about not feeling bloated. Of course they don't feel bloated because any menstral formula pain reliever has a diaretic in it. Oh, nice you can be not bloated because you have to spend the day in the bathroom shitting out your inners. Not exactly bikini friendly problem.

What about the bikini tampon commercials? How does that work? Sorry my tampon string hit you in the head when I stepped over you. I just don't get feminine hygiene advertising.

The latest commercial inteligence is mind boggling. I just saw the commercial and I had to get right on here. The latest stupid ass commercial is brought to you from Always maxi pads. The new slogan and your gonna love this.

HAVE A HAPPY PERIOD

Being as I am having my period and use Always I know this is pure bullshit. How in hell am I supposed to have a happy period. Is the pad going to take away my cramps, my bloating without strapping a toilet to my ass, or even this insane chocolate and salt craving that is going to make me blow up like the Hindenburg. No I don't think so. So, now you know where this weeks insanity lies.

Beware the queen bitch is back in town.

ttfn

Work quote for today.

Where the fuck is everybody? Does anyone work here?

ttfn

Hello I'm Doublebagger and I'm a Harry Potter freak

I own almost all of the Harry Potter books and when the new one gets here I will own them all. I own all the movie's now.

Sorceror's Stone on dvd
Chamber of Secrets on vhs and dvd
Prisonor of Askaban on vhs soon on dvd too

I have a date with my Zevon to see the new movie Goblet of Fire when it comes out in November.

It's a standing date for the next three movies too. I will also buy the 7th book when it comes out. Right now me and the little minion are watching Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets.

Little Harry Potter fact:

The dark haired friend who dates vile ritchard in Bridget Jone's Diary is Moaning Murtle from the Harry Potter movies. Watch the Chamber of Secrets and Bridget Jone's Diary and see.

So, time for movie with the baby boy, shower, and bed. Work bright and early tomarrow morning.

So, What now?

Bored beyond all measure. So, let's post some poetry:

You Saved Me

You saved me from my darkest fears.
And wiped away all my tears.

Your love saved mefrom a pit.
I don't know how much lower I'd get.

You listened and did not judge.
When I pushed you away you didn't budge.

I love you with all my heart .
I always have right from the start.

I wrote this for my ex about 2 months before he left me. Now I take it back and give it to my beloved Zevon. The man who makes my heart go pitter-patter.

ttfn

Please let me beat my children

Why you might ask would I want to beat my delightful minions? Because I discovered last night that children are evil little liars. Not much of a surprise to most, but the degree of deseption was mind numbing.

OK. My first mistake was letting the minions have a friend sleep over when I had to work the next day. The second was thinking I would get any sleep at all.

I got them in bed and the lights off before 11 pm. No small feat. Then I got to sleep before 12 am, once again a miricle. Then I awake at 12:30 am to see the small minion with his face about 3 inches from mine watching me sleep. Needless to say this scared the shit out of me. Then he runs off yelling that mommy's awake. From this time until about 2:30 am there was lots of laughing and yelling. Them laughing and me yelling. I am soo.... tired today. They are grounded until I decide they're not anymore. They are also going to bed early tonight.

OK. on to the lieing part. They told me that they would be good and quiet. They also told me they would go right to bed and to sleep when I told them. Or else I never would have agreed for them to have a friend over.

ttfn

More KY Jelly crap

OK, Now that I should be the official spokesperson for KY Jelly bullshit. I think they need to change the commercial for the massage oil. The commercial says that it's a two in one. A massage oil and a personal lubricant. First off ew. Where do you apply it first? Now this is not the most disturbing thing.

The most disturbing thing is the false advertising in the commercial. I have held this product(while still in the container) in my hand, and read the back lable. On the back lable in bold red print are the words, "NOT TO BE USED AS A PERSONAL LUBRICANT." Hey I wonder what that means. What a bunch of dumbasses.

ttfn

Our great tragedy.

Last night we lost a very special member of our family. Most people do think of a pet as a member of the family. In our case she was like a child. Being as their are no obituaries for pets. I decided to use my blog to say a special farewell to this beloved member of our family. We will always love and miss her.

Farewell to Miss Pickles

At approximatly 10 pm on Saturday, July 9, 2005 the world was robbed of a beautiful canine soul. This beautiful black labrador was snatched from our lives when she was run down by a motor vehicle in front of her home. Miss Pickles loved to be brushed. Her hobbies included plate licking, being petted, and wrestling.

She is proceeded in death by her mother Jessica. She is survived by her human father Zevon, her human step-mother Doublebagger, and her human step-brothers the minions.

She will be greatly missed by all her breif life has touched. She will live on in out hearts and minds forever.

Bugs (shudder)

You'll never guess what my kids brought home from their father's house this week.

Yeah you've guessed it lice. Of course I didn't find them until almost 4 o'clock yesterday. So, I was up until 2 am tossing the house. Any of you who've been through a lice outbreak knows what I'm talking about.

1. All bedding must be washed and dried.(pillows, sheets, and blankets)
2. Beds must be sprayed with lice spray.
3. Floors vacuumed
4. couches sprayed
5. All heads in the apartment treated.
6. Clothes washed

This took all day and half the night. After all of this I got up at 7 am and went to work. It's now 11 o'clock at night and I have to go to bed.

ttfn

I am more than cool.

I am soo.....cool. I just kept the neighbor boy from getting his ass kicked. Even though he so deserved it, but alas I did not want to get my kid in trouble. I am sorely tempted to kick the kids ass on a regular basis.

This time I hear banging on a door upstairs. I go outside to realize that all the kids in the complex are banging on the dumbasses door trying to get one of the kids stuff back. So, being the only parent home in the complex I have to referee and solve the problem.

What ever happened to resonible parenting? Last time I checked leaving your children at home alone for long hours was illegal. Then again, why should they all pay attention to that? This county has the highest rate of meth addiction in the state. I moved out of my old neighborhood for just that reason. This is a relatively small city and we've had two murders here in the last week. Does that not say this city is going to Hell in a handbasket? I wish I could convince myself I would be better off elsewhere, but I don't think I will. It's still relatively calm in here. I'm hoping in the next few years to get a house in a better neighborhood.

ttfn

I always knew I was perfect.

I always knew I was perfect, but now I have proof. Today I was called into the office at work. I thought, "Oh Shit." They found out about Doublebagger and they want me to stop or fire me. Then I realized that was rediculous they would have to prove it, and frankly it's not really worth thier time.

Then my next thought was I was on a secret shop and blew it. This is a scary thought being as they tend to harp on you until you cry when you blow a shop. Quite frankly I didn't feel like crying today. Yelling yes, crying no.

Well it was none of the above. I was on the secret shop, but I didn't blow it I aced it. I got all the atributes perfect. So what if everyone else fucked up. I was perfect.

ttfn

This is a one float town.

In the town in which I live we have right around three parades a year.

1. The christmas parade sucks ass one float and lots of fire and tow trucks.

2. The 4th of July parade sucks ass lots of fire and tow trucks and yeah you guessed it the same damn float as in the christmas parade but with no lights insted of red and green lights.

3. The last parade is the kids day at the fair parade. This is held the first day of our county fair. Guess what, The same damn float, tow trucks and fire trucks.

This wouldn't be so bad if it was a tree or something cool. What you might ask is this hideous float? It's a big wire whale that they just change the lights of for the different parades. I find this pathetic.

ttfn

I will never understand my boys.

My oldest minion has been beat up almost every other day this week. Why you might ask? His little 10 year old 55lbs. soaking wet mouth writes checks his equally scrawny ass can't cash. He' s definately my son. You know without the good sense god gave a house plant.

The first one was a teenage girl that his friends told him to walk up to and ask if she was dating the biggest geek in the neighborhood. At which point she bitch slapped the boy and knocked him down. In this incident he bruised his elbow and got a huge scratch on his back.

The second incident the boy pissed off a 7 year old with a nasty temper. This time he got a headache and a black eye.

The last one and the boy did something, he always does. He was chased down by the neighborhood kids(two of them). They held him down and beat him. This time he has two chipped teeth and is sore all over.

Maybe this time he will learn, maybe not.

Now he says he doesn't know who did it, when he knew last night. He also says the kids he originally said did it are his friends now. What kind of a friend beats you or even holds you while you're beaten? I'll never understand my kids.

ttfn

Sleep is good.

I need sleep. I havn't slept well in the last week. So, soon I will beat the minions into submission and put thier evil little asses to bed for the night. Then read myself into exahstion. Hopfully I will feel well rested when I go back to hell at 7:30 am tomarrow.

Goodnight all.

ttfn

And I thought I through a really good bitch fit.

I saw the mother of all bitch fits today. Who you might ask through this fit? Not me, or even one of my co-workers. Of all the people I thought it could be it turned out to be the Coca-cola merchandiser. If you don't know who that is it is the person who stocks the coke product on displays and the shelf. Well, his truck got there at 8 am, and he didn't get there until 1:30 to stock his product. Well, UGH had gotten a shipment and the pepsi merchandiser had already been there. So, needless to say all his product was boxed in. Then we needed the product for the customers. The coke guy was upset throwing things and bitching in a loud voice. He was pissed at us, the pepsi guy, the customers, and of course good old Doublebagger because of course being in a bitchy mood is what I do best. I told him to butch his ass up and get the product on the shelf because things were tough all over. (Yes, I can be mega bitch when I wanna be.) I just think that if your not cut out to do your job, don't pretend you are just do it half assed and get out. Needless to say my arms and back hurt like hell. After having to take the diet coke out to customers. At least 50 twelve packs of diet coke. All in about 35 minutes. I want is a hot shower, a beer, and to go to bed. But alas I have evil minions so I must feed and put them to bed first.

ttfn

Whoo Hoo!!

Two days until the evil minions go on visitation.
Yes, the forth of July I send the minions to their daddy. I will go to work at 9 am, then at about noon they will go with thier dad, and then at 5 pm I get to go home. Yes, I know working on a holiday sucks, but not that bad. Can anyone say double time and a half. Hence the whoo hoo. First no kids and then double time and a half. Hell yeah. I also have to work all weekend, but I get lots of monies on payday in two weeks.

ttfn